Sunday is chill-out day at my place. I tend to stay in my pj’s a few hours longer, and, until two or three in the afternoon, my fiancé and I are snacking, lounging and just generally zoning out.
Last week, after one of our extended do-nothing Sundays, he emerged from the shower with a dramatic, “Wow, that felt really good.”
Since I was still on the sofa, absentmindedly eating cereal out of the box and feeling a bit scummy and useless, I was struck by how much better he seemed to feel. I know from experience that a hot shower almost always snaps me out of a funk and refreshes my senses. I also know from experience that when I get careless about taking care of myself physically, it’s often a sign that something is emotionally amiss.
Now I’m not saying it’s bad to have the occasional “whatever” day of guilt-free goofing off. Sometimes nothing else will do when you need to press the reset button. But, aside from this, physical self-care can be a great barometer of emotional balance.
CLICK FOR RELATED CONTENT |
|
Just as everything else I do, say, think and feel is an indication of my deeply held beliefs about myself and my life, my self-care routine (or lack thereof) can show me where my belief systems are coming up short.
Even though I may be telling myself I’m worthy of time and attention, the fact that I’ve quit flossing my teeth, for example, doesn’t exactly bear that out. The way I take care of myself doesn’t just give me insight into my emotional status, either – it directly affects my emotional well-being. This is just one way that different aspects of wellness interact. It’s all connected.
The Basics
So what does proper self-care involve? It’s not an all-at-once, all-or-nothing overhaul. It begins with the simple willingness to become aware, to become more conscious of how I treat myself, asking myself if each particular action (or lack of action) is in line with the person I want to be. Like any aspect of wellness, it’s a process of growth rather than an idealized destination. Self-care is a set of behaviors that results in greater physical well-being, which, in turn, impacts my emotional health directly. The great thing about the process is that taking one small action at a time really can add up to measurable change in my quality of life.
The most obvious place to start is with the basics. I can’t stand the word hygiene, as it smacks of 1950s health class awkwardness, but there it is. And there’s a lot to be said for the invigorating sensation of being squeaky clean. Answers.com’s World of the Body details our cultural history of cleanliness attitudes, and Booker T. Washington is reported to have “emphasized the ‘gospel of the toothbrush,’” embracing and promoting “hygienic living as a means of uplift.” Washington knew, in a very literal sense, that affecting change starts with the self. Wake up, clean up, and then take one step toward changing the world.
Looking Good
By the same token, looking my best can also be a shortcut to feeling better. Sometimes, after a day of meetings, errands and work, the prospect of attending an evening function or simply meeting friends for dinner can seem like more trouble than it’s worth, even if it’s something I really want to do. But give me a chance to wash my face, brush my teeth, change clothes and put on some eyeliner – I’m a new woman. The simple act of freshening up functions as a psychological cue, a way to remind myself, ‘This is what we do when it’s time to perk up.’ Even if it takes a few minutes to shake the sluggishness off, it’s nice to know I can change my outlook with just a few physical actions.
It might sound overly simplistic, but this same principle is the central philosophy of a nonprofit organization for cancer patients: Look Good, Feel Better. Since both cancer and its treatments can cause drastic and upsetting changes to personal appearance, the program’s mission statement asserts that “if someone with cancer can be helped to look good, their improved self-esteem will help them to approach their disease and treatment with greater confidence.” Looking good isn’t just a way for me to recharge after a long day; it’s powerful medicine.
Conscious Snacking
Self-care isn’t just about the way I look. It’s also about my eating and exercise habits, and how I choose to address my body’s needs. To illustrate: a Double Mocha Machiatto every once in a while never hurt anyone. But, if you’re anything like me, caffeine and sugar are all too easy to use as a quick fix for an energy slump.
When I reach for overly-caffeinated, empty calories, I’m not paying attention to what my body needs. I’m responding unconsciously to discomfort in my body and mind, when I may simply be dehydrated or needing a snack that includes some protein.
It takes practice to break the habit, but I don’t have to do it all at once. I can try, just for today, to pause and ask myself, “What is my fatigue (or hunger, or inability to concentrate) telling me?” Then if I try it again tomorrow, and the next day, pretty soon I find myself reconsidering, choosing more healthful options when I’m exhausted or hungry. Repetition strengthens and confirms, which just means that practice makes perfect.
Keep Moving
In terms of exercise, we tend to think of inertia in terms of inaction. The more you sit, the more likely you are to stay sitting. But inertia works the other way as well - bodies in motion tend to stay in motion. The challenge of becoming active is a struggle for many, and it’s normal to feel overwhelmed by the seemingly daunting task of becoming physically fit.
When I can remember to relax and let the law of inertia work on my behalf, I can trust that, once I start moving, I’ll stay in motion because I’ve taken the biggest step, which is getting started. When I first began running, I read that the first quarter mile is the hardest part. This is when resistance is strongest. If I can push through that first bit, though, the inertia of movement takes over, and, suddenly, I’m hitting my stride.
Medical Needs
Taking care of my medical needs is a key component of self-care as well. I have life-threatening food allergies, so I have to make sure I carry an Epi-Pen with me at all times. I didn’t always do so, but my self-esteem and self-love have increased a lot in the last several years, so I’ve become aware that saving my own life, should the need arise, is a priority.
Many medical conditions aren’t simply a matter of taking a pill once a day and being cured. Diabetes and high blood pressure, for example, are just two examples of conditions that benefit most from comprehensive lifestyle changes.
Again, the prospect of a total life makeover can be rather daunting; just thinking about incorporating all that change at once would make me want to go right back to bed. But just like the other aspects of self-care, let’s simplify and see this for what it really is: a process of becoming aware and making small changes over time.
Checking In
A quick and effective tool for checking in on my physical and emotional well-being is the acronym HALT, which reminds me that, if I am Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired, I can’t be very effective or happy.
If any of these red flags is in play, I can halt and take a small, manageable action to remedy the situation. Every act of self-care, aside from its immediate and specific effect on my physical body, can be elevated to an act of devotion and self-love.
It’s also a way of slowing down and becoming present in the moment. It’s a way of demonstrating that I am indeed worthy of care. Worth is immutable: we are always worthy. Self-esteem, however, comes from performing esteemable acts. Our emotional selves only respond to what we do—what we follow through on. Our emotions say, “Prove it to me.”
Author: Liz Davis
Website: http://www.123FeelBetter.net/
Have your say! Comment in our forums.
Insight Journal Monthly Health and Wellness Newsletter
Wellness concerned? Find out what you can do to promote your wellness everyday!
Got questions? We've got answers. Get expert insights here.
Digg
Stumble It!
del.icio.us
Add to Any
