If it’s being a long time, and you are still going through the emotional
rollercoaster of a breakup, feeling pain, anger and depression, know this: You
don’t need to suffer one more day over your ex! It doesn’t matter
how long you have suffered, or how deep the pain is, it is time to let go and
welcome a new life.
If it hasn’t been easy to heal after your breakup or divorce, the cause
may be a strong attachment to your ex, causing deep emotional pain in your
life. Emotional pain is generally accompanied by deep emotions such as melancholy,
depression, regret and anger.
There is a constant internal conflict caused by your need and desire to feel
good and the pain caused by the uncontrollable memories associated with your
ex. This conflict can leave you exhausted physically, emotionally and mentally.
At times, you may feel that it is hopeless to do anything, because you feel
that there is no way you can eliminate those memories or even change them.
Sometimes you may find that the pain goes away and that you are able to move
on; however, it only seems to be temporarily, because the pain seems to come
back again and again. You wonder if you will ever be able to forget or remember
without pain.
Don’t despair. There is a true healing solution. First, you need to
know and acknowledge that you deserve to let go. You don’t need to be
permanently attached to painful memories and experiences. It may be easier
than you think to change these negative feelings, and to stop the conflict
inside of you.
Decide right now that you deserve to let go and move on. You don’t need
those memories anymore. You certainly don’t need the internal conflict
or the strong negative feelings anymore. You have better things to do with
your life. You deserve to let go starting NOW. It doesn’t matter how
long you’ve been attached to the haunting memories of your ex(es); NOW
is a good time to let go of the pain, LAYER BY LAYER. The Layers Of Deep Healing
When memories are so painful, we may wish we had selective amnesia, and forget
certain times and people in our lives. Unfortunately, it is very unlikely to
get such amnesia; but we can transform all the painful memories into neutral
memories, that don’t drain us emotionally.
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How can you transform deep pain into neutral memories? By using the layer
system to heal deep emotional pain. This system is nothing more than a process
of healing layer by layer, until all the pain is gone. Each layer is different
from the other, and includes different elements that contribute to the pain.
When you work each layer and then let it go, you heal that layer; then you
can move on to the next one, until all are healed.
Imagine that you need to get rid of a white onion. If you peel a few layers
of the onion, you still have some more left. Only by peeling ALL THE LAYERS,
you can get rid of the onion fully.
The reason why some methods of emotional healing seem to work is because they
heal one or two of the layers; however, if the other layers are not healed,
then the pain will return.
There are four layers of deep pain and healing. There is pain coming from
each layer, from memories, imaginary situations and thoughts. These sources
of pain can be identified and transformed. As you work through each layer,
you will heal all deep emotional disturbances. When you are done, the memories
of your ex will just be memories such as your history professor in 8th grade,
or a casual coworker from your last job. Believe it!
© 2005 Jeanette Castelli. Adapted from the book “Extreme Deep Healing” by
Jeanette Castelli, M.S. A do it yourself Workshop-In-A-Book®. Features
a step-by-step guidance through the layers of deep pain and healing associated
with any breakup, separation or divorce. Proven method to heal the deepest
and most overwhelming breakup pain. Great resource to go with any 12-step recovery
program. Includes exercises, worksheets and affirmations. Personal coaching
available from author. Book available at website: http://www.Breakup.Urbantex.com/
Author: Jeanette Castelli, M.S.
Website: http://www.breakup.urbantex.com/
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Ever wanted to know how to heal a broken heart? What to do after a
breakup? Or how long it will take to get over an ex? If you have these
and other breakup questions,